I wrote a post earlier about how I am not sad about not having an Earthly father. But, recently I have just really recognized some tendencies that come with my lack of relationship with my Earthly father during one of my quiet times I wrote a letter to my dad as if I were to send it to him and I also wrote a letter to my Heavenly Father and I just felt very compelled to share it on here. I also added some awesome scripture at the bottom hat have helped me and comforted me,
I am not sure what to call you, but calling you your name sounds weird and calling you dad sounds weird. I have accomplished so much in my almost 20 years on earth. I became some strong, I learned how to see my worth through God’s eyes and not the eyes of the boys in my life. I learned what I deserved, that I deserved someone good and honest and faithful. I found that I was worth more than your selfish tendencies. That at the end of the day, and the place you were at, you didn’t deserve to be my dad. Being around you would have caused more pain than the what I have felt in the past years. I have gained such a respect for my mom for raising me on her own, for making the choice that was tougher, but ultimately what was best for us. Now that I am older I see what a blessing your absence has been for me, but how much stronger I am for it. I still have awkward moments when I have to explain that I don’t know anything about you, but honestly, sometimes it is easier to make up stuff to avoid the conversation. I still can’t fathom why you chose to make the choices you did, but you did and I don’t hold it against you. I have forgiven you. Sometimes I even forget about you. But I pray for you, I pray for your safety because one day when you die I might not know and that saddens me for some reason. But, I turned your absence from something that could have destroyed me to something that empowered me and for that I am grateful.
Thank You for being You. Thank You for providing and protecting me like no Earthly father could. Thank You for Your unending grace. I am so blessed with our relationships. You take care of me so well, always giving me what I need, not always what I want. Thank You for listening to me and comforting me in my times of need, for being my shoulder and placing people in my life to comfort me. Thank You for entrusting my mom with me, for speaking into her life and guiding her choices. You always bless my life more abundantly than I could ever imagine and You give me so much peace! Thank you for holding me in Your right hand and never letting go. I crave Your consistency and Your love every day. I strive to make You proud and shine Your light into this very dark world. Thank you for being God.
Psalm 68:5, “Father to the fatherless, defender of the widows– this is God, whose dwelling is Holy.”
Joshua 1:9, “ Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”
Deuteronomy 31:8, “The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”